40 Best Halloween Jokes For Your Kids To Trick Or Treating

Published on   Oct 13, 2020

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It’s time to tickle your funnybones, ladies and gents. With Halloween fast approaching, it’s the perfect season to bring a little fun back to our lives. The pumpkins are carved, the candy is ready- it’s time to give the kids another treat to enjoy. Keep the ghouls and ghosties at bay (or laughing too hard for a trick, at least) with these fun, fantastic Halloween jokes suitable for the whole family.

Puns? One liners? Good old jokes? We’ve got something for everyone, from thrill-seekers to scaredy-cats. No matter what your sense of humor prefers, there’s sure to be something to delight your heart and keep you howling with laughter here.

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Get plenty of giggles with these delightful one-liners

If wood gets scared, what do you call it? Petrified!

What’s a Teen Witch’s favorite school subject? Spelling.

What’s the best fix for a broken pumpkin? A pumpkin patch, of course!

2 ghosts visit a carnival. Where do they head first? The rollerghoster and the scary-go-round.

Why didn’t the mummy take time off work for Halloween? He was too afraid to unwind!

Could the ghost see it’s parents? Of course not, they were trans-parent!

Where do ghosts head on vacation? Mali-BOO.

What do birds say when they knock on doors at Halloween? Trick or Tweet, please!

Aa vampire called the local handyman in a panic. What was wrong? Well, you see, he had a grave problem with the plumbing.

Why was the narcissistic mummy always alone? He was way too wrapped up in himself to make friends.

What did the vampire and the ghost name their baby? Frostbite.

What happened when the witch dared the skeleton to ride her broom? He didn’t have the guts to do it!

If you send a vampire a fruit basket, what should you always make sure is included? Plenty of neck-tarines.

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Crowd a little DEAD? Liven them up with these jokes to DIE for!

Where’s the last place you’d find a vampire, ghoul, or ghost? The living room.

What did the ghoul say to the shy vampire at the Halloween Party? C’mon, buddy... live a little!

Why was the witch late to her date? Her ma- scare -a wouldn’t dry.

What’s a mummy’s favorite music? Wrap Music.

What did the ghostly panda have for lunch? Bam-BOO!

Why did the vampire reform his eating habits? He’d heard that stake was bad for his arteries!

Where does a family of witches hide their secrets? In the broom closet.

What do witches do at the gym? Hex-cercise.

Who does Frankenstein introduce to his parents at Halloween dinner? His ghoul-friend, of course!

Who keeps the graveyard clean and neat at night? The Grim Sweeper.

What did the ghost order at the restaurant? Ghoulash.

What did the vampire get his doctor to do for him? He wanted his annual blood tests.

A ghoul wants to buy a house. Where does he tell the real estate agent he wants to live?

On a dead-end, if possible!

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Halloween jokes? You’ve got them under WRAPS this year!

Why wouldn’t the pretty girl let the vampire kiss her? She’d heard it was a pain in the neck!

Why was the skeleton super-sad at Halloween? He had no body to love him.

What dessert did the ghoul order at the restaurant? I-scream with chocolate sauce.

Why did the police have to investigate a noise disturbance at the graveyard? There was an awful lot of coffin!

Why did the ghost cancel his Halloween party? He was scared the rain would dampen everyone’s spirits!

Why do they put walls around cemeteries? Because too many people are dying to get in.

Where does a skeleton take his car to repair dents? The body shop, naturally.

What did the monster do when someone rolled their eyes at his bad jokes? Rolled them back to them, of course!

If you had to guess, what is Dracula’s favorite circus act? Well, I’d say he goes for the juggler.

What do you call the monster who can never find his way around town? The where-am-I-wolf.

What vegetable is orange, round, and funny? A PUN-kin.

A skeleton holds a very fancy dinner party. As dinner is served, what does he say to his guests? Why, it’s got to be ‘Bone-appetit’, of course!

What do you serve a witch on holiday? Her favorite sand-witches.

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We’re sure you’ll elicit thrills, snickers, and probably an eye-roll or two with these giggle-worthy Halloween jokes and puns. Why not keep your favorite ones ready to tell while you’re on your trick-or-treating this year- if they’re extra funny, you may even find yourself

coming home with the full-sized candy bars! With a well-timed joke up your sleeve, you’re sure to scare away all the boogeymen, so stay safe and have plenty of fun!

What do you think?